Thursday, November 30
My mom has been depressed for the past two weeks. She misses Bangladesh, she misses my dad, she misses being able to pick up the phone and calling up her friends, she misses taking a rickshaw and going over to visit her family and friends. I've been trying everything I can think of to cheer her up. It's just not working. I am now getting depressed seeing her sad all the time. I miss my dad too, but I feel like I can’t really express my feelings to her because then it will make her even sadder than she already is. How do you make the pain of losing someway go away? It’s been a year and a half almost and I still feel the pain as raw and violently as I did the day he passed away. I can't even imagine what she feels like. I find myself trying to work longer hours so that I don’t have to go home and see my mom’s sad face. I feel horrible.
Tuesday, November 14
I miss hearing your voice. I miss talking to you. I miss the smell of your cologne, mixed with soap. I miss your smile. I miss our conversations. I miss how you never used to finish a sentence. I miss eating from your plate. I miss holding your hand. I miss your honesty. I miss your simplicity. I miss your naivety. I miss your child like curiosity. I miss picking out your gray hair. I miss your delight in simple things. I miss your love.