A night of furious writing

I opened blogger to write a new post. Raffae saw the webpage, recognized it I guess and asked me to show him his birthday story! Then he wanted to write another story. He started telling me his story and before I knew it, he had three stories for me!

Something is missing in the house
By Raffae

Raffae, mommy, Zoya and nanu were missing in the house. They went to work. It's a ghost. There was a ghost in the house that said, "Boo!!!!!!". It had a dangerous teeth. It bite someone. It was a little ghost. Then he bite the little ghost. Then happily ever after. The end.

Raffae won the race
By Raffae
Raffae is driving the racing car. Then he raced, he raced, he raced, he raced, he raaaaaaaaaaaaaccccceeeeeeeeeeddd. The color of the car was red. Then I won the trophy.

Zoya story
Zoya was playing. Then she got a Zoya car. She loves it. She loosed it. Then she lost it. But the ghost ate it. Then it got broken. But, but, but he ate the doll. It doesn't have more batteries. The ghost ate the batteries. Then the batteries and the car and the doll went to the ghost's tummy. It was good for the ghost. Then Zoya got another car. She got another pink car. She loosed it again. The ghost ate it again. The end.

Conversation at this point:
Tanveer: How about a papa story?
Raffae: No we are doing kids story
Me: So Raffae what is your next story about?
Raffae: How about a story about a blue car?
Me: We did a car story already
Raffae: How about a purple car story?
Tanveer and me together: No more car stories.
Raffae: (really excited) How about a truck story! I love that truck story.

So here's the truck story!

The truck was going. Then there was a kid. His name was Raffae. Raffae was driving a truck. Then the truck went faster and faster. The end.

I love these evenings! Before I know it, they will be all grown up and gone to college!

(The stories are typed just as the author dictates them. No corrections have been made.)

A life-changing experience

Tanveer and I went to BODIES The Exhibition on Saturday. I could probably talk about the exhibition for hours! Here is a bullet point list of things that mesmerized, entertained me:

• It was breath-taking to see the supposedly 60,000 miles of veins and arteries running through the body. What they did is they injected red liquid silicone into the whole vascular system and let it harden, Then they took away the rest of the body leaving an intricate, mind-boggling human shaped concentration of blood vessels. I am sure the lighting added to the final effect, but it was cool to see how each drop of blood can pass through the heart once in every 60 seconds!

• I knew about the three tiny bones in our middle ear, but I couldn’t believe my eyes that those miniscule things on display in front of me are what makes it possible for me to hear my children’s laughter! I love my Malleus, Incus and Stapes!!!!!!!!

• There was one display box that contained the largest organ of the human body. You know what that is?! Skin! It looked gross! It looked like someone had laid out an outfit or something. It looked like you could make a purse or briefcase out it! :-P I am sure I will think about this one next time I am buying something made out of genuine leather.

• Thank GOD I never felt the urge to smoke! To see the pearly white, broccoli looking healthy lung and the blackened lung of a smoker next to each other was quite a shocking experience. No wonder the strategically placed trash box next to the display was filled with cigarette boxes. I hope all those people that did through their cigarette boxes in the trash, do quit smoking.

• I was amazed to see the size of a Uterus. I have no idea how my poor uterus held a 9 pound 3 ounces baby and all the amniotic fluid and whatever else!

• I held a human brain and a heart in my hands………

• Last but not least, the room that displayed stages of embryonic and fetal development. There were cases of embryos in different developmental stage. As early as three weeks old and you could already see the different features of the face, hands and feet. There were cases of fetus where the pregnancy went horribly wrong. It was heart wrenching to see the little bodies. I think I will sit on the fence forever on pro-choice vs. pro-life arguments.

From the day the exhibition started, it has been shrouded by controversies. Yet, I’d say this was one of my most memorable days of my life! It was educational, emotional, and thought-provoking. I think this was THE push I needed to start taking better care of myself. To see how complex the human body is, MY body is, gave me a different perspective on life. As one of the posters on the wall at the exhibition said so aptly “Why wouldn’t you be interested in your body? This is the only thing that you have with you from birth to death”. I hope people can put their prejudices aside and go stroll through the exhibition and maybe learn something new about their bodies.

When is getting raped a better option?

The answer is when you are a woman in Darfur! I heard a feature on NPR and also read this article on The Christian Science Monitor about the group known as Elders lead by former president Jimmy Carter that went to Sudan recently. Here is a paragraph from the article:

Some people they visited slipped them notes full of allegations of rape and other abuse by militias aligned with the Sudanese government. The wife of former South African President Nelson Mandela, Graca Machel, told of her meeting with women in Darfur. "The first thing they told us they need security," she said. "They need security. They gave us examples of what happened to them, even graphically, to show how women are being raped, are beaten and are brutalized. I think because they thought we may not get a clear translation, they went at length of using gestures to show us how brutal it was, the kind of assault they are subjected to."

NPR had a more detailed interview with their reporter who was traveling with the Elders. She reported the women said they are raped a lot of times when they go out to fetch wood for their stoves or to get their hands on some food for their family. When asked why the men of the family couldn’t do those chores, the answer was “If the men go, they will be killed. We are just getting raped”.

How horrible is that?

Update: Here is one way you can help. Save Darfur

Raffae-ism

Raffae: Ladies are pretty and gentlemen are incredible.
Me: Don't you mean "gentlemen are handsome"
Raffae: Yeah! Gentlemen are handsome and strong!!

To happy Beginnings

I was close to crying. My chest felt like it will explode anytime now from all the emotions raging inside me. Zoya’s teacher looked at me and asked “How is Mommy doing this morning?” I smiled a proud smile. Today was Zoya’s first day at pre-school.

We have come so far away from that day when we almost lost her. She has grown into a cute little girl who enjoys looking at picture books; loves to listen to music, and sing; enjoys going out; loves food; knows her alphabets, colors, shapes, numbers; loves to get tickled; loves her family. I know she will love this school also. Here is to happy beginnings Zoya. May you go farther in life then you can ever dream of, may you be happy in life doing whatever it is that you want to do. We will always be there for you with all our love and support.

Soulmate

If you take your life lessons from Bollywood - not only the concept of soulmate is true, you only ever fall in love with your soulmate. With your first sight of the person, you know this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with and you would even die to be with this person.

According to Mills and Boon - your soulmate is ALWAYS good looking, charming, suave, intelligent, witty.

Science says soulmate is with whom you have the correct chemistry.

Bangladeshi culture says your parents know better who your soulmate is. (I know that's a huge generalization, but those of you that are from BD, know what I mean)

I don't believe in any of these alone. I think it is more a permutation and combination of all these. What are some of your thoughts?

Here's to my Princess

Happy Birthday Jaanu. I love you!

I feel horrible

You always hear stories like this and think things like this never happen to me, but it does! A family friend in Bangladesh has been missing for the past couple of days. He is my Mom's best friend's husband. No one knows what happened. He was close to 70, but in good health. No one knows if he was kidnapped for ransom, or if he had some sort of rivalry with someone and that person tried to hurt him somehow. My mom is quite upset over this incident and we were talking about it this morning. I can't imagine what Aunty is going through right now! I was telling ammu about abbu, that he was sick, he suffered and passed away - all in front of us and we are still hurting two years later. If they never find Uncle, can you imagine what Aunty has to go through for the rest of her life, what their kids are going to think for the rest of their lives! I atleast have some closure, what will they do?! Will they ever find him? If they do find him, in what condition will they find him? Is it better if he is never found or is that even worse? Would they then think all kinds of horrible thoughts?? I am so genuinely sad for them. I wish I knew how to console them. I wish I could help somehow.

Bitter sweet

A friend from high school, whom I hadn't seen since then, came to visit during Labor Day weekend with his wife and two kids. Essentially, I've known him only as a teenager. To meet him as an adult and to find out that I like him even more as an adult was a great feeling. He has done well for himself, has a LOVELY wife whom all of us adored to death, and the kids! Oh wow! Raffae was instantly friends with S who is just a month younger than him. My mom and I got busy with N who is just about five months old! She is simply adorable. The next day, I offered to baby sit N as my friend and his wife wanted to go see some places in DC. S refused to leave without Raffae, so ammu and I ended up babysitting all four kids and Tanveer took them to DC. The kids had fun coloring, playing at the park, napping on couch cushions on the floor. S was very affectionate towards Zoya too. Every time Raffae and she went to the basement or to another room, she took Zoya with her. Zoya received loads of hugs and kisses from her throughout the weekend. Both S and Raffae cried when it was time to say goodbye. We put S in the car promising to send Raffae and Zoya by mail! She is bugging her dad everyday to talk to the postman since Raffae and Zoya haven't arrived yet! How adorable is that!?

And then we found out my Boro mama (eldest maternal uncle) suffered a heart attack. After my mom's heart attack in 2001, everyone in the family recognizes signs of heart attack and he was taken to the hospital immediately. He received proper treatment at the right time, so he is out of danger at the moment, but will have to take a lot of care of himself for the rest of his life. The scary thing is this mama is the most finicky eater in the family. At 74, he is still very active. You would think he wouldn't be at risk for heart related problems except for that one fact - gene. Almost everyone on my mom's side has had a heart attack or has passed away from stroke. It’s scary to think that I happen to carry that gene too!!!! I need to get in shape, need to lose all these extra pounds I gained during the pregnancies. Just can't seem to motivate myself enough to go to the gym! How much more of a sign do I need?!

I want, I want, I want!!!!!!!

This one and this one!!! OMG! I am so happy that I might not sleep tonight!

Zoya singing ABCs

Silent Tears

It was past 1:30 am and I was crying silent tears. I had just finished reading "A Thousand Splendid Suns" by Khaled Hosseini. Wow! What a story! The main story evolves around two women, from very different backgrounds, in Afghanistan – how their lives got entangled together in a loveless marriage with a brutal, physically violent husband. At first, I thought it was a bit slow-paced and somewhat predictable. Then I got to a point where I couldn’t put it down. I made Tanveer mad because I had the bedside lamp on and he couldn’t sleep. But I had to finish the book last night.

I knew what happened in Afghanistan under Taliban regime and before that under the Soviet invasion for the past 30/40 years. Reading about it all over again, now with two endearing protagonists in the picture, I was trying to put myself in their shoes. I can never imagine not going to work. Specially, if me not going to work meant my kids would have to go without food, what would have I done? What would I have done if I were told that there is no place for me in the hospital and I am about to give birth? What would I have done if I was told I couldn’t go out by myself? That I have to wear Burkha all the time? That I could be beaten for no apparent reason? That my daughter can not go to school? That I cannot watch TV/movie/play? That all books are “haaram” except the Quran? Scary, huh? And that’s only the tip of the iceberg. My heart went out once again to all the women out there. Not just in Afghanistan, but all over the world. Afghanistan, Sudan, Bangladesh, US – doesn’t matter where. There are women out there, living in fear, living under oppression, even at this time and age. I need to do something.

I remember seeing an episode of Oprah where she went to see some women being treated in a clinic in South Africa. A lady from US was so moved by the story that she decided to do something for the women. She didn’t have a lot of money, so she started making bracelets for the women with her daughter using simple, colorful beads. Next time when Oprah went back, she took the bracelets with her. You should have seen the smiles on everyone’s faces. No one probably ever stood up for them, let alone gave them anything nice. This small bracelet made them soooo happy. I kept thinking about it before falling asleep. I need to find out something I can do, even if it something as simple as making bead bracelets. My friend Katie is involved with an organization called "Nari Jibon". I need to give her a call.

I am proud to be a woman and thankful for the life I have.

A Birthday Story

by guest writer: Raffae

Long long time ago, there was a birthday. Happy birthday to Raffae. Raffae has balloons, and cakes and horns and candles. Someone has to hide and say Happy Birthday Raffae. Yup that's my story.

Murphy’s Law prevails

I have called for free tickets to U2, Madonna and some others tour tickets offered by the radio station I listen to on my way home. Usually I never get through. If I do get through, I am usually not the caller 10 (usually that’s the person who gets the ticket). On my way home yesterday, I called and was the caller 10 and got the free tickets – to go see American Idol tour.

Any huge American Idol fan out there that wants to take the tickets off my hand?

P.S. I don't like how my voice sounds!

I miss Bangladesh

My mom got a phone call from Bangladesh this weekend. It was from a lady who used to be our neighbor in Chittagong for as long as I can remember. Obviously after my mom came to US to live with me, she lost touch with a lot of people in Bangladesh. This lady was missing my mom so much that she set her son, Morshed, on a manhunt literally. Her son had cell phone numbers that my parents had used in Bangladesh at different times. He called each one and talked to the person answering the phone to figure out if that person knew where my mom is, could give him a number where he can reach my mom. He hit gold when one of those numbers was answered by my phupu. My mom gave my phupu her phone before leaving Bangladesh. So after pleasantries, Morshed got my mom’s cell phone number here and called over the weekend.

I was so touched by this incident. I kept thinking about chachi (as we used to call her) all throughout the weekend. I remember she used to send us Halwas, mistis, different types of pithas almost every week. My sister and I were regular visitors to her kitchen. Both her and her husband adored the two of us since they had three sons and no daughters. Whenever I had gone to Bangladesh in the past, I had always made a point of visiting her since she was always just couple of steps away. Now with Abbu gone and chacha retired, I hear they have relocated to Dhaka to live with their son. I kept thinking would I see them again?

Why do I not meet people like that over here? Is it me? Am I not open enough to people? Or is it really the people in Bangladesh? Are they born to be hospitable towards everyone? Are they more trustworthy towards people? Whatever it is, I am missing my childhood days like crazy.

Happy Birthday Raffae

My baby is turning four today! Many many happy returns of the day jaan! Love you. Mommy

Motherhood

Motherhood is funny. Without even realizing what you are getting into, you get into this unconditional relationship with someone for life! I was up to my neck at work when my mom called this morning. I answered the phone and before she could say anything, I heard Raffae crying in the background. I was instantly snapped out of my work mode into my mommy mode. I had a feeling this morning that he is going to have a rough day today. We enrolled him for swimming lessons at the community pool. He has been going to the pool every day for an hour or so and as a result comes back home dead tired. We dragged him to the mall with us last night after he came back from his swimming lesson and by the time we came back home, he was so tired he went to sleep right away. This morning, he woke up cranky and I suspect he is still tired. My mom said she has tried everything that normally cheers him up, but all he wants today is his mommy!!! My poor baby! I broke my decision of not giving him any of his birthday presents before his birthday and told my mom to give him one of the board games I got him. Hopefully that will keep him busy till mommy gets home with loads of hugs and kisses (not the candy, real hugs and kisses!). As for my work load, since my attention is pretty much shot for the day, I'll be playing Scrabble with my Facebook buddies for the rest of the day!

Observation of the day

Some people are sooooo stupid that I wish I had a mallet to hit them over the heads and make them better. Nuff said!

Beauty comes with a price!!!

Last night when I was taking out my contact lenses, one of them ripped! It looked quite intact on my hand, but once I went to bed, my eye kept watering and it felt like I had something in my eye. So I gave my eye a good rub. No change. More rubbing. No change. Then my head started throbbing. At one point, I got up, went to the bathroom, splashed some water in my eye and went back to bed. Couple of mintues of rubbing, burning later, I went back to the bathroom again and looked carefully. Holy crap! I see a small piece of my lense floating around in my eye!!!!!!!!!!!! EEEEKKKK. Panicked, I call Tanveer. Took him a while to even see the piece. He is all thumbs anyway, so he was no use! Everytime I tried to grab the floating piece, it escaped and I ofcourse touched my eye and that burned like hell! After five or so minutes, Tanveer was getting ready to take me to ER. I felt as if it came out. So I decided not to go to ER and sleep on it.

This morning, I woke up with a throbbing headache! It still felt like there is something in my eye. I followed the same routine of rinsing and rubbing. I called my brother-in-law who is an eye surgeon. He said I probably have an abrasion from all the rubbing. Definitely go see a doctor if it is still bothring me tomorrow morning.

Then sometime during the afternoon, I felt something slide across my eye. This time I looked into one of those mirrors that magnifies the reflection and I saw the culprit folded neatly right around my lower lid! I closed my eyes and it came out!!!!!!

I am glad my eye is still intact!

The worlds of ZeeNotes and Jiggety Jig finally collided

Finally we got to meet Katie Z and Isaac this weekend! Katie left a comment on Tanveer's blog sometime ago and when Tanveer checked out her blog, he found out we have a common friend! How small is this world! I've been reading Katie's blog ever since. She came to DC last week with her son Isaac (Coolest kid ever! Really funny. Kept us entertained and was very patient with Raffae) and was able to come visit us on Friday. Here are some pics of Raffae and Isaac. They jelled instantly, as if they were separated at birth!

See how they both know how to pose for the camera!

Isaac shared his Gameboy with Raffae

Raffae was worshipping Isaac for letting him play his Gameboy

Isaac very patiently showed Raffae how to play