Dear Amanda Berry

I apologize on behalf of all decent human beings for the last 10 years of your life. However you look at it - 10 years/120 months/3650 days/87,600 hours/5256000 minutes/315,360,000 seconds - it's f*ing long time! I can’t begin to think the horror you went through. Ever since you kicked your way out the door and into our hearts, I have been obsessively reading every article I can find online. What a nightmare this must have been for you three! I can’t even think about you without tearing up. With a daughter of my own, I am trying to make sense out of this nonsense. How do I teach her to not trust anybody yet to keep trust in the goodness around us? How do I teach her to fight back in the face of adversity without losing hope? How do I teach her to have faith in herself when she doubts herself? How as a mother do I protect her from crazies out there? I can’t keep her in a bubble for long, though I sure would like to try. How do I let her go out there when I am scared of unknowns myself. I hope someday, I can tell her your story and show her after all that monster did to you, he couldn't break you down! What a lovely soul you are! Your courage makes me proud, your smiling face brings me hope that you will be ok. I pray life brings you ONLY happiness from today onward. Stay strong! Take care of yourself and know we are all very, very proud of you.

Link I am loving today

Stumbled on this website somehow. Absolutely adorable!

You are my wild

Things that should not be discussed at work

We all know not to discuss religion, sex life, politics, money issues, health issues at work. Imagine my discomfort when I overhear a co-worker discussing bowel movement on the phone! Read on for more details!

I had to go to DC last week for a work meeting. I don't go to the DC office all the time. We have what we call "hotel cubes" for situations like this. So I'm sitting at my hotel cube with some other people that i don't know occupying nearby cubes. This guy starts chatting on the phone with someone. I'm usually very good at tuning out other people's conversation. This conversation however went on for a while and I started paying attention to what is being said. This is how the conversation went down:

Co-worker: "she has been constipated since the weekend! "
........
Co-worker: "no, it's not helping. I was sitting right next to her and I could tell she was in pain!"
Me thinking "TMI to be discussing at work"

Then I got busy with work. In between, I kept hearing "I don't want her to be girly. I want her to be playful"I
Me thinking "oh lord! Is he going to start discussing his sex life now!!??"

Co-worker: "she tries to grab my hand!"
Me thinking: maybe I need to take a walk to the kitchen! Oh I got it! I'll put on my headphone and pretend I'm listening to songs or something!

Co-worker: "love you mom! You should come soon to visit your new granddaughter"
Me thinking: "I seriously need to get my mind out of the gutter!!!!!!!"

Funny Car Sticker

Anyone who knows me, knows I have a weird sense of humor! That weird sense of humor was tickled pink this morning seeing this sticker on the car in front of me ;-)

Calculator Trick

Raffae's class celebrated "Electronics day" the other day - its an incentive for kids to be on their best behavior and being able to bring an electronics to school one day. Sadly, most everyone comes to school armed with a Nintendo DS and spends the time playing with it. Raffae doesn't have a portable game device and was almost in tears that he doesn't have anything to bring to school and no one is going to share their DS with him. He wanted me to give him my iPad which was absolutely not happening! So I thought why not find some cool math tricks that he can use a calculator for and I had a feeling, it would tickle his nerdy side. I found some cool math tricks and showed them to him and he was in heaven! Now what I didn't show him is below! Try it out, won't you!!?? :-) .




(Type all the numbers in the parenthesis on your calculator)

There was this girl she was (13) years old. she wore bra size (84). she wanted to wear size (45). so She went to the doctor and he said (0) take these (2)(X) a day. She took them (4) times a day. and she ended up...



turn your calculator upside down to see the answer. Works best with regular calculator fonts. I know! I have a weird sense of humor! :-)

Lesson Learned

Went to Starbucks this morning on my way to work to get my coffee. I always ask for "Tall, regular coffee with room for milk" and they always give it to me full to the brim. As I was diligently pouring out some of the coffee in the trash can to make room for milk, the barista looked at me and said "Next time, ask to pour the coffee in a Grande cup so you don't have to waste good coffee."

I am in utter shock over all the good coffee I poured out over the years!

Boohoohoo!!!

I ADORE Sarah Jessica Parker, but this article just might have put a chink in the statue.

Sarah Jessica Parker reveals perils of cheap shoes

She can obviously afford the finer things in life, but to talk about it openly while the women going to watch her film is actually wearing the "cheap shoes" she is bad-mouthing - not a good strategy. On the other hand, that explains the sixth toe on my left foot! 

New Project

It is supposed to be a loop scarf. This pic was taken couple of days ago. I have about 2 more inches now. :-)

Ask Who I Am, Not What

Just recently, I had a conversation with a friend who said even though she was born and brought up in USA, she constantly gets asked "Where are you from?", not "What is your ethnic background?". Her offense? The color of her skin. When I heard about the Race Card Project on NPR this morning, I thought of that conversation first. Listening to some of the stories that have been collected over the past two years for the project, I was reminded of this incident. We are lucky that we live in a diverse community and I truly believe no one around me is biased by race, but then there are those little things people say that gets me once in a while. At International Night at kids school, we made a poster for weddings in Bangladesh. Someone asked "Where's the elephant?" Err...not all weddings have elephants! Actually, I dont think I've been to any weddings that had elephants! If you are going to use Indiana Jones movies as your sole cultural reference to South East Asia, I don't have much to say to you! Then there's always the "How did you learn to speak English?" In Bangladesh, by going to school once I was done fetching water and food from the jungle! Thank you very much! How do we break down these cultural barriers? There are people I know who are very interested to know about my background and they are not afraid to ask questions. They are truly the minority. May be its time I volunteer to the PTA and start a open discussion on Diversity among parents. I truly believe its much better with our kids. They are growing up in a multicultural environment and they accept that different people have different backgrounds, stories. Raffae's class just did a project on immigration and I thought that was very cool. We need more projects like that on a bigger scale!




My Six Word Story:



Judge me once you know me

Hairy Situation!

Zoya tells me the other day that she doesn't like the fact that she is the only girl in her class who has hair on her arms! My dad's side of the family is a hairy brood and I guess I have passed it down to her! I alone have kept many a different beauty product companies in business by getting rid of unwanted hair over the years, but she is too young to be starting now! Or is she? I told her she is too young to be starting these type of things at second grade when she informed me one of her classmates gets her hair dyed blonde! Really?!?! Why?!? In second grade?!?! Wow! However, I'm still not budging. I've removed my razor from the shower so she all of a sudden doesn't put two and two together. I don't think she knows about the other products I have under the sink. Lets see how long I can hold her off!

What do you think? Too early? (She is 8) When did you start? (I got my first threading done at 18!!!!) What was the first thing you tried?

And I am back...............

I've been itching to come back to blogging for a while now. Had a little down time today and thought why not start today. Its been a while - some things are still the same, some has changed for the better I hope. The kids have grown into little (pre) tweens, hubby is doing well. I like to think I've matured over the last couple years while I have been gone from the blog world. Celebrated the big 40, feel calmer, very comfortable in my own skin :-), have friends and family I am proud of, reading again now that I don't have diaper duty anymore! A good place to be in and I am grateful for that.

So, if you are a new reader, here's an ABC Meme on myself. If you are a follower/subscriber, here's to refreshing your memory!

A. Age: 41
B. Bed Size: Queen
C. Chore you hate: Tidying up!
D. Dogs: Not a dog fan. Not a cat fan either. Not a pet fan. Period!
E. Essential Start to the day: My cup of tea
F. Favorite Color: Black and White
G. Gold or Silver Jewelry: Silver
H. Height: 5'2"
I. Instrument you play: Does Harmonium count?
J. Job Title: Applications Development Analyst
K. Kids: Two. Son - Raffae. Nerdy, omnivourous reader, cub-scout, video game afficionado. Daughter - Zoya. Drama queen, very good at drawing, future pianist, omnivorous eater, video game afficionado (kicks raffae's butt pretty regularly)!
L. Live: Maryland and love it
M. Movie I last watched - Silver Lining Playbook (in theatre), 5 Year Engagement (on tv)
N. Nicknames: Lubna, Vejal, Buno
O. Overnight Hospital Stays: 8 years ago when Zoya was born. Didn't sleep a wink the whole night cause drama queen was in full blown performance mode!
P. Pet Peeves: When people don't put things back to its original place after using
Q. Quote from a movie: Err...Expelliarmus!!!!!
R. Reading (currently): Swallows of Kabul by Yesmina Khadra
S. Siblings: One. Sister. Canada. Two cute nephews
T. Time it takes you to get ready: Without shower - 10 minutes, with shower - 30 minutes
U. Ultimate Vacation: What can I say. I love travelling. Every time I get to go to a new place and experience the culture is my ultimate vacation!
V. Vegetable you hate: None really
W. What makes you run late: Kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
X. X-Rays you have had: Do sonograms count?
Y. Yummy food that you make: Lot of things :-) I'm a decent cook
Z. Zoo animal: Giraffae? Panda? Dolphin? Lion? I dont know. I'm not a pet person, but I like going to zoos!

Learrn anything new? Did any answer surprise you? I'd love to read your ABC meme if you have a blog or you can leave a comment with your answers!

She has a point!

So Zoya doesn't want to shower today. When I told her she doesn't have a choice, she went into the bathroom and slammed the door. I made her open the door and asked her why she slammed the door. Her answer: "I read in National Geographic that you are more likely to be in a bad mood on a Thursday. Today is Thursday. So I must be in a bad mood"! Kids!!!

Leave the girl alone!

Never did I think I'd write about Aishwarya Rai, let alone defend the beauty queen. She had been vilified in the indian press recently about her weight gain during her first pregnancy. I heard there is a video up on youtube with her post-pregnancy images where they used an elephant stomping sound in the back. Really?! I can understand people raising an eyebrow when they see her now, after all, the girl used to look like a goddess!

But to actually call her out in public like that is just shameful! The first days of motherhood is a special time. She should be doting on the gorgeous baby girl she has. If she wants to take her time to lose the weight, leave her alone people! She finally looks human, feels human, let her be human.

Some ranting

I find it hard to accept when I hear someone killed himself/herself. Even worse is when I hear a father killed the whole family and then killed himself. Seriously – what can be sooo bad that you have to take a life/lives? If you have the courage to kill your innocent 4-5 year old kids, what is out there that you can not face? I’ve seen multiple cases recently where the family is losing their homes, losing jobs and then as a last act of desperation, killing the whole family and themselves. Why?!!! Why?? Why?? People get set on a type of a lifestyle and they just can not see themselves living a lesser of a lifestyle. Atleast that’s one reason I see behind these killings. When did we become so vain?

P.S. This and this prompted this post. And I just found this!!! God help us!

Beating myself up

Yet another year went by and I still weigh about the same as I did at the beginning of the year, if not more! No clear muscle definition is visible either! So it's not like I've lost fat and gained muscle! On top of that, Tanveer has gone all out on health and fitness this year! As some of you already know, he did the Livestrong challenge this year. He is planning on doing it again in 09. He is also digging up all these core strengthening exercises from the web and actually doing them! He has made a lot of changes to his eating habit and I can see the results of all these, yet I still am not motivated enough to do those things for myself! How sad is that!? Oh did I mention he actually bought a treadmill for me since I always said that if we had one at home, it will be easier for me to workout? Meanwhile, yet another of my uncles suffered a stroke this year. This one brings the number to FIVE strokes/heart attacks on my mom's side of the family! So I am a high risk too.

I secretly wish for my pre-pregnancy body back. I fantasize about how I will work out, eat healthy and become a size four again, but put any food in front of me and I forget all about eating healthy, getting that body back, let alone be more responsible for my health. I tell myself I'll work out when I get home, but when I get home, I feel too lazy/find excuses not to exercise. It scares me to think what would happen to the kids if I am not there to take care of them, but I obviously don't feel strongly enough to make becoming healthier a priority. What an awful person I am!

I've been soooooo down last couple of days. What can I do that would not let me forget what my priorities should be when there is a box of cookies in front of me? I don't need to go to a body building competition. I don't even need to look good in a dress. I need to be healthy - for myself, for my kids, for my family.

No more sad endings

I have come to the conclusion that I don't ever want to watch a romantic movie that has a sad ending! I watched "Mr. and Mrs. Iyer" last night. If you haven't watched the movie yet, stop reading here. Major spoilers ahead. Why the hell couldn't she go with him? She should have just gone off to the jungle with him and had dinner with him under the moonlight while getting bitten by the mosquitos! AND she would have been happier! Who cares that there is no running water? Who gives a damn that they are from different religions? After all, they are not real! Its only a movie! Just make the audience happy!!!!!!!!!!

Same goes for "Lust, Caution". Its only a movie people! Just let the general save the poor girl and let her wear her quail diamond ring and her nice clothes and let her lust after him. Done. everyone is happy. What's so hard to understand with this concept?

I think I am going to watch more hindi movies from now on. 100% guaratee that the guy is going to get the girl, no matter how many twists there are in the plotline. One movie gives you romance, action, suspense: what more do you want??!!

Life is not fair

We were eating lunch when his phone rang. He looked at the number and excused himself to answer the phone. Within seconds, I could see the smile getting wiped off of his face. He is usually always smiling, somewhat of a goofball. It was really unsettling to see the range of emotions playing on his face, none of them a familiar look on him. Looked like he wanted to cry. After he hung up, he told me his grandmother just passed away in India. He is moving back to India in a week. I spent a lot of my drive home imagining him as a little kid, being spoiled by his grandmother. Hope he is doing ok.

Election Night Tidbits

7:48 pm
It must be surreal for the candidates to sit there and watch the numbers

7:57 pm
I hope and hope and hope that I NEVER, EVER have to see Sarah Palin after tonight. Not even on 2012! Please go away!

8:21 pm
Huffington Post is saying: Obama 103, McCain 34!!!!!!!!!!! :-D

8:47 pm
I want something sweet...

8:55 pm
Was trying to convince Neetha to come over. Didn't work :-(

9:09 pm
Glad to hear that Toot's vote for Obama will be counted :-)

9:26 pm
THANK YOU OHIO!

9:48 pm
Can't wait for Obama's victory speech. I think I'll most definitely cry! :-P

10:01 pm
Found THREE old friends on FB

11:04 pm
HELL YA!!!!!!!!!! OBAMA! OBAMA! OBAMA!

11:38 pm
Proud to be a part of this historical moment in this great country

11:43 pm
What is Anderson Cooper going to do from tomorrow? :-P

12:26 am
(sigh of relief) Yes we can!

My take on Palin

Those who say they are going to vote for McCain because they like Palin, scare the shit out of me. Come on people! Do you not realize that, God forbid, if something happens to McCain, it will be her running the country!?! Didn't we learn anything from EIGHT embarrassing years under Bush?! Come to think of it, compared to her, Bush seems intelligent! She is just too bubbly, too pageant like! I don't want my VP to be an intellectual featherweight! I don’t think I've ever disliked any woman this much without really knowing her! Every time I hear the expression that Palin is "only a heartbeat away from the presidency", my heart skips a beat! God forbid, if they make it to the White House, I’ll have to start praying for McCain’s good health!

BTW, Tina Fey was just ridiculously awesome as Palin! :-P

Holy Guacamole!!!!!!

It just rained over here. Well, there really wasn't any raindrops! It was all hail. This was picked up after another five minutes of rain and still look at the size!

Mosquitoes

I got a chuckle out of this piece as I was listening to it on the radio on my way to work this morning. You could read the article here but I'd say listen to it. It was kinda funny! Or maybe its just my weird sense of humor :-P

Look what I found at the library!!!

I went to get some books for the kids from the library yesterday and the first book caught my eye! How cool! Needless to say, I brought it home, but we were not able to read it cause a little girl was intent on reading "Run, mouse, run". Most of the words were simple enough that she could read them on her own and I think this new found achievement made her want to read it over and over and over again. Raffae patiently waited, and waited and waited for his turn, but I was not allowed to put "Run, mouse, run" down. I'll have to make sure we read Raffae's pick first tonight.

Space junk

I was driving the other day and wasn’t really paying attention to the radio. Something must have caught my ears and I started listening to the interviewer talking to some Hillary supporters, asking them if they are ready to support Obama. This one guys says something like “I don’t trust Osama, I mean Obama. I’m sorry. Their names are very similar. His middle name is Hussain. He used to live in a Muslim country. I am just not sure if I can trust someone like that.” I swear I wanted to hurt this guy violently. I mean seriously! How can you be this close minded?! As far as I am concerned, you are occupying valuable space on this earth. Could I please hurl you out of this earth into the vast space where you can be just space junk?!

Weekend Frolickings

Our local shopping center opened a Coffee shop and we have been meaning to take the kids there to see how they behave! So on Saturday morning, put some coloring books, crayons, books etc in a bag and took the kids there! They LOVED it and were content to sit there on the couch/rug and color! At one point, Zoya was laying on the couch with her feet propped on the back of the couch, eating her apple! Looked very comfy! :-)

Then we went back home, filled up the small backyard pool/slide combo my sister sent for the kids and let them play in there for a while. We have had trouble with getting Zoya into the pool in the past, cause she thinks the pool is just an extension of the bathtub and wants to take off ALL her clothes when she gets to the pool! So when we saw that she was happily playing in the small pool, we decided to take the kids to the community pool. She just jumped right into the pool and never came out! She was in 2.5 feet of water, floating holding one of those foam noodle thingy! Raffae has been going to the pool for the past two years and still can't float! She is just such an daredevil! I should also mention that she was wearing a mickey mouse swimming trunk and nothing else. So a lot of people thought she was a boy! :-P I couldn't get her to wear any of the pink/yellow girls swim suits!!!!!! So I got her the trunk thinking she would probably wear this since she loves Mickey Mouse. Now she refuses to wear anything else, even a top! LOL

I then went to a co-worker's wedding reception which was fun, cause I got to dress up and all my non-desi co-workers were completely at awe at my saree!!!!!!!! I am such an attention hogger!

On Sunday, we got up late and went to a birthday lunch party. Within two minutes of arriving there, Zoya got hit on her nose by a frisbee! It was ugly! There was blood everywhere and I had to spend the rest of the time there, trying to placate her! I was just glad her nose was ok!

So didn't do anything this weekend as far as laundry, cooking etc is concerned but did have loads of fun and the weekend just ended way too quickly!

This I believe

This piece made me cry. Seriously.

Read and listen here

She might never know it, but I am so very proud of this young lady.

Ramblings on a Tuesday

I've been going through mood swings a lot lately. I get annoyed at the kids easily, I am stressed at work, I keep telling myself I'll start going to the gym this week and "this week" never materializes. I often think I will not be materialistic, I won't be vain, I won't be judgmental; yet I find myself in knots from worries that are truly vain in nature, I judge people when I don't take the time to get them to know better. I am nearing 40 and I feel like I should be able to do/say what I want to do and say, yet find myself stifled by my own inhibitions. I am letting myself down, I am letting my family and friends down and I have no one but myself to blame.

The Ogre in me

I have been in a nasty mood this past weekend. I took out my frustration and anger on people around me. In an effort to stay away from everyone, I tried cleaning out closets and drawers; threw away whole bunch of stuff, but I still bristled. I cleaned bathrooms, yet the raging bull inside me was dying to get out. I need to get a handle on my emotions. I need to say what’s on my mind even if it would mean confrontations that I try to avoid. By avoiding confrontations, I am creating conflicts. Not a win-win situation.

Am I too paranoid?

I heard this story on the radio this morning. Came to work and looked it up online. It really scared me even though the news article is saying they have ruled out terrorism! The fact that this happened in a small town makes me even more uncomfortable. The person they interviewed on the radio said the town never used Chlorine for their water system before and visitors used to praise how the water tasted there. Now they have to use Chlorine to flush out the Salmonella. Made me sad.

Link to the article

Let’s start with what’s on my mind. Shall we?

Raffae is scheduled to attend Kindergarten orientation in May!! I can’t believe he will be going to school, making friends, going to the cafeteria, making lunch choices, reading, writing – all by himself?! I hope he loves school. He is such a happy child that I know he will. I hope no one picks on him or bullies him!

I am ready for summer, ready for a new job with shorter commute. Need to start applying…….

Blog Hiatus

I have been soooooooooo busy at work these past couple of months that I didn't even think about blogging. Now I don't know if I want to come back! I don't know if I have anything to write about. Did anyone miss me?

Such a waste

My kids scare me sometimes!

I was watching Amazing Race last night. This morning, as I was driving the kids to school, Raffae gave me a scene-by-scene description, along with the exact lines spoken by the different people on the show. He remembered everyone’s names, which team got to the finishing line in what order, everything! I’ve been watching the show diligently as usual, but I still don’t know everyone’s names!

Yesterday, I was sorting out the Baby Einstein DVDs that Zoya loves to watch. We have 10 -12 DVDs. So I had all the DVD boxes and all the DVDs in front of me. Zoya would pick up a cover, look at the animal picture on the cover and tell me “Mommy, can you find green?” - meaning that specific DVD has a green border!!!!!!!!!!! She was correct every single time! Good God!

I wish I had memory like that!

2007 in pictures

I meant to put this post up on December 31st. Raffae got sick and we also planned a last minute New Years Eve party, so I never got to finish this post ontime. Nonetheless, here are highlights of the clan from 2007.

• Raffae and Zoya made new friends






• I met up with friends: old and new.





• Zoya grew an insatiable appetite for apples!





• Raffae's accomplishments:




• Did loads of stuff with the kids




• We traveled to visit family and new places




• Had good food!!!




• It was GREAT to have my mom here with us!

To all the important people in my life, wishing you a wonderful year ahead.

Bye 2007!! Hello 2008!!

Wow. Another year gone! I was thinking about the past year and surprisingly, I kept coming back to Zoya. 2007 was definitely Zoya's year! She has made sooooooooooo much progress that it is almost mind boggling! She has flowered from a shy little girl to a bubbly, music-loving, school-going, cute-as-ever chatter-box!!!!!!!! We are all eagerly waiting to see what she accomplishes in 2008.

Raffae also amazes me everyday with his wit, his mischiviousness, his keen observations, his intelligence, his kindness. In his own words: "He is incredible!" He will start kindergarten in 2008. I can't believe my baby is all grown up!

Tanveer managed to get a job 15 minutes from home. He is lot happier about his commute, though his office mate might drive him to look for another job! (She is growing a garlic plant in the office!!!!!) He plans to go back to school in 2008 to finish his masters.

Ammu has adjusted well to US (I think!). She doesn't miss Bangladesh as much as before. Since the kids are going to school now, she finds herself home with lot of free time on her hands. So she decided to go visit her family in Bangladesh for Eid. Once she is back, she plans to get involved in some sort of work which will keep her busy.

As for myself, I've done a tremendous amount of work this year! Managed to keep the house clean enough that I didn't have to call the Clean House crew in! Did some travelling, read some good books, made loads of friends! Didn't lose any weight! That's what I definitely need to work on in 08. I also want to start looking into MBA programs :-) Wish me luck.

Happy New Year everyone!!! Now lets get the party started!!!!!!!!!!

I don't understand

I don't understand how someone can feel so strongly about something that they don't mind killing themselves to injure others to illustrate their point of view. In a way, I am envious that they have found their passion in life. I know I am not that passionate about anything! Then I start thinking did they really know the true consequenses of the situation they were about to create? Did they make this final decision on their own or did someone influence them? How do you influence someone to that extent? How do you make someone believe in your own beliefs? I was talking to my sister and she said she watched a documentary where someone was about to blow themselves up and that person was in constant contact with the so called leaders of the group. The leaders kept up a constant vigil, telling the suicide bomber how he will be going to Allah, how he will be granted heaven and all its heavenly goodies, how what he is doing is what Allah calls for him to do etc. Its as if they don't want to give him time to think something else. No chance of getting cold feet when someone is constantly telling you something other than what your conscious might try to prevent you from doing. I hate all the violence in the world.

I'm Spanish

We went to an indian restaurant for dinner the other day. Below is a conversation that happend in there:
Raffae: Look mommy, indian people! (He was pointing to a painting on the wall)
Me: Yes Raffae. You are indian too! Actually you are Bangladeshi.
Raffae: No!!!!! I am English!
Me: No Raffae. You are from Bangladesh too just like mommy and daddy.
Raffae: You are not from Bangladesh!
Me: I am!
Raffae: No you are not!
Me: What do you think I am, Raffae?
Raffae: You are spanish.

If my own son thinks I am Spanish, I must be. I am also worried about my parenting skills! Is he too young to understand all these (He is 4) or am I not teaching him enough about his ethnicity?

Phanatics and Phools

Well "Phools" just looked good with "Phanatics". I meant "Fools". Anyway, what is the world coming to? Here are two stories that caught my eye this morning.

• Muslim Teddy Bear
  
• Just plain dumb
  

I don't think 7-8 year olds really know a lot of names beside their friends' names and I am going to bet anything that a lot of kids in that classroom has the name "Mohammed". I would have thought it was cute that they wanted to call the Teddy Bear Mohammed! But obviously some people are just way too sensitive about religion.

And that stupid guy. I really don't want to think about the offsprings he is going to produce/have produced and their intelligence levels.

Done with my bitching for the day. How are you all doing?

Random Observations

I have been travelling quite a bit recently for work, vacation. Here are some random observations from airports and planes.

• I saw an older gentleman at the airport the other day with a big Charlie Chaplin face on his socks!!!!!! How cute! I wanted to take a picture of it!



• I can't quite my finger on it but I really liked the Detroit airport. I was also intrigued to see all the signs at the airport displayed in multiple languages, including one that looked like Korean?!



• I like watching the shadow of the plane during landing. The shadow gets bigger and bigger and then all of a sudden it just thinks "enough already!" and hurries up and catches up with the plane. With a jolt (literally), you realize the plane has touched down!



• I found out you can buy a book at a chain store at the airport, read it and return it (with the original receipt) within the next six months for 50% money back. How cool is that?!



• I like the restroom stall doors at Chicago O'Hare and Midway which start from the floor.

A night of furious writing

I opened blogger to write a new post. Raffae saw the webpage, recognized it I guess and asked me to show him his birthday story! Then he wanted to write another story. He started telling me his story and before I knew it, he had three stories for me!

Something is missing in the house
By Raffae

Raffae, mommy, Zoya and nanu were missing in the house. They went to work. It's a ghost. There was a ghost in the house that said, "Boo!!!!!!". It had a dangerous teeth. It bite someone. It was a little ghost. Then he bite the little ghost. Then happily ever after. The end.

Raffae won the race
By Raffae
Raffae is driving the racing car. Then he raced, he raced, he raced, he raced, he raaaaaaaaaaaaaccccceeeeeeeeeeddd. The color of the car was red. Then I won the trophy.

Zoya story
Zoya was playing. Then she got a Zoya car. She loves it. She loosed it. Then she lost it. But the ghost ate it. Then it got broken. But, but, but he ate the doll. It doesn't have more batteries. The ghost ate the batteries. Then the batteries and the car and the doll went to the ghost's tummy. It was good for the ghost. Then Zoya got another car. She got another pink car. She loosed it again. The ghost ate it again. The end.

Conversation at this point:
Tanveer: How about a papa story?
Raffae: No we are doing kids story
Me: So Raffae what is your next story about?
Raffae: How about a story about a blue car?
Me: We did a car story already
Raffae: How about a purple car story?
Tanveer and me together: No more car stories.
Raffae: (really excited) How about a truck story! I love that truck story.

So here's the truck story!

The truck was going. Then there was a kid. His name was Raffae. Raffae was driving a truck. Then the truck went faster and faster. The end.

I love these evenings! Before I know it, they will be all grown up and gone to college!

(The stories are typed just as the author dictates them. No corrections have been made.)

A life-changing experience

Tanveer and I went to BODIES The Exhibition on Saturday. I could probably talk about the exhibition for hours! Here is a bullet point list of things that mesmerized, entertained me:

• It was breath-taking to see the supposedly 60,000 miles of veins and arteries running through the body. What they did is they injected red liquid silicone into the whole vascular system and let it harden, Then they took away the rest of the body leaving an intricate, mind-boggling human shaped concentration of blood vessels. I am sure the lighting added to the final effect, but it was cool to see how each drop of blood can pass through the heart once in every 60 seconds!

• I knew about the three tiny bones in our middle ear, but I couldn’t believe my eyes that those miniscule things on display in front of me are what makes it possible for me to hear my children’s laughter! I love my Malleus, Incus and Stapes!!!!!!!!

• There was one display box that contained the largest organ of the human body. You know what that is?! Skin! It looked gross! It looked like someone had laid out an outfit or something. It looked like you could make a purse or briefcase out it! :-P I am sure I will think about this one next time I am buying something made out of genuine leather.

• Thank GOD I never felt the urge to smoke! To see the pearly white, broccoli looking healthy lung and the blackened lung of a smoker next to each other was quite a shocking experience. No wonder the strategically placed trash box next to the display was filled with cigarette boxes. I hope all those people that did through their cigarette boxes in the trash, do quit smoking.

• I was amazed to see the size of a Uterus. I have no idea how my poor uterus held a 9 pound 3 ounces baby and all the amniotic fluid and whatever else!

• I held a human brain and a heart in my hands………

• Last but not least, the room that displayed stages of embryonic and fetal development. There were cases of embryos in different developmental stage. As early as three weeks old and you could already see the different features of the face, hands and feet. There were cases of fetus where the pregnancy went horribly wrong. It was heart wrenching to see the little bodies. I think I will sit on the fence forever on pro-choice vs. pro-life arguments.

From the day the exhibition started, it has been shrouded by controversies. Yet, I’d say this was one of my most memorable days of my life! It was educational, emotional, and thought-provoking. I think this was THE push I needed to start taking better care of myself. To see how complex the human body is, MY body is, gave me a different perspective on life. As one of the posters on the wall at the exhibition said so aptly “Why wouldn’t you be interested in your body? This is the only thing that you have with you from birth to death”. I hope people can put their prejudices aside and go stroll through the exhibition and maybe learn something new about their bodies.

When is getting raped a better option?

The answer is when you are a woman in Darfur! I heard a feature on NPR and also read this article on The Christian Science Monitor about the group known as Elders lead by former president Jimmy Carter that went to Sudan recently. Here is a paragraph from the article:

Some people they visited slipped them notes full of allegations of rape and other abuse by militias aligned with the Sudanese government. The wife of former South African President Nelson Mandela, Graca Machel, told of her meeting with women in Darfur. "The first thing they told us they need security," she said. "They need security. They gave us examples of what happened to them, even graphically, to show how women are being raped, are beaten and are brutalized. I think because they thought we may not get a clear translation, they went at length of using gestures to show us how brutal it was, the kind of assault they are subjected to."

NPR had a more detailed interview with their reporter who was traveling with the Elders. She reported the women said they are raped a lot of times when they go out to fetch wood for their stoves or to get their hands on some food for their family. When asked why the men of the family couldn’t do those chores, the answer was “If the men go, they will be killed. We are just getting raped”.

How horrible is that?

Update: Here is one way you can help. Save Darfur

Raffae-ism

Raffae: Ladies are pretty and gentlemen are incredible.
Me: Don't you mean "gentlemen are handsome"
Raffae: Yeah! Gentlemen are handsome and strong!!

To happy Beginnings

I was close to crying. My chest felt like it will explode anytime now from all the emotions raging inside me. Zoya’s teacher looked at me and asked “How is Mommy doing this morning?” I smiled a proud smile. Today was Zoya’s first day at pre-school.

We have come so far away from that day when we almost lost her. She has grown into a cute little girl who enjoys looking at picture books; loves to listen to music, and sing; enjoys going out; loves food; knows her alphabets, colors, shapes, numbers; loves to get tickled; loves her family. I know she will love this school also. Here is to happy beginnings Zoya. May you go farther in life then you can ever dream of, may you be happy in life doing whatever it is that you want to do. We will always be there for you with all our love and support.

Soulmate

If you take your life lessons from Bollywood - not only the concept of soulmate is true, you only ever fall in love with your soulmate. With your first sight of the person, you know this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with and you would even die to be with this person.

According to Mills and Boon - your soulmate is ALWAYS good looking, charming, suave, intelligent, witty.

Science says soulmate is with whom you have the correct chemistry.

Bangladeshi culture says your parents know better who your soulmate is. (I know that's a huge generalization, but those of you that are from BD, know what I mean)

I don't believe in any of these alone. I think it is more a permutation and combination of all these. What are some of your thoughts?

Here's to my Princess

Happy Birthday Jaanu. I love you!

I feel horrible

You always hear stories like this and think things like this never happen to me, but it does! A family friend in Bangladesh has been missing for the past couple of days. He is my Mom's best friend's husband. No one knows what happened. He was close to 70, but in good health. No one knows if he was kidnapped for ransom, or if he had some sort of rivalry with someone and that person tried to hurt him somehow. My mom is quite upset over this incident and we were talking about it this morning. I can't imagine what Aunty is going through right now! I was telling ammu about abbu, that he was sick, he suffered and passed away - all in front of us and we are still hurting two years later. If they never find Uncle, can you imagine what Aunty has to go through for the rest of her life, what their kids are going to think for the rest of their lives! I atleast have some closure, what will they do?! Will they ever find him? If they do find him, in what condition will they find him? Is it better if he is never found or is that even worse? Would they then think all kinds of horrible thoughts?? I am so genuinely sad for them. I wish I knew how to console them. I wish I could help somehow.

Bitter sweet

A friend from high school, whom I hadn't seen since then, came to visit during Labor Day weekend with his wife and two kids. Essentially, I've known him only as a teenager. To meet him as an adult and to find out that I like him even more as an adult was a great feeling. He has done well for himself, has a LOVELY wife whom all of us adored to death, and the kids! Oh wow! Raffae was instantly friends with S who is just a month younger than him. My mom and I got busy with N who is just about five months old! She is simply adorable. The next day, I offered to baby sit N as my friend and his wife wanted to go see some places in DC. S refused to leave without Raffae, so ammu and I ended up babysitting all four kids and Tanveer took them to DC. The kids had fun coloring, playing at the park, napping on couch cushions on the floor. S was very affectionate towards Zoya too. Every time Raffae and she went to the basement or to another room, she took Zoya with her. Zoya received loads of hugs and kisses from her throughout the weekend. Both S and Raffae cried when it was time to say goodbye. We put S in the car promising to send Raffae and Zoya by mail! She is bugging her dad everyday to talk to the postman since Raffae and Zoya haven't arrived yet! How adorable is that!?

And then we found out my Boro mama (eldest maternal uncle) suffered a heart attack. After my mom's heart attack in 2001, everyone in the family recognizes signs of heart attack and he was taken to the hospital immediately. He received proper treatment at the right time, so he is out of danger at the moment, but will have to take a lot of care of himself for the rest of his life. The scary thing is this mama is the most finicky eater in the family. At 74, he is still very active. You would think he wouldn't be at risk for heart related problems except for that one fact - gene. Almost everyone on my mom's side has had a heart attack or has passed away from stroke. It’s scary to think that I happen to carry that gene too!!!! I need to get in shape, need to lose all these extra pounds I gained during the pregnancies. Just can't seem to motivate myself enough to go to the gym! How much more of a sign do I need?!

I want, I want, I want!!!!!!!

This one and this one!!! OMG! I am so happy that I might not sleep tonight!

Zoya singing ABCs

Silent Tears

It was past 1:30 am and I was crying silent tears. I had just finished reading "A Thousand Splendid Suns" by Khaled Hosseini. Wow! What a story! The main story evolves around two women, from very different backgrounds, in Afghanistan – how their lives got entangled together in a loveless marriage with a brutal, physically violent husband. At first, I thought it was a bit slow-paced and somewhat predictable. Then I got to a point where I couldn’t put it down. I made Tanveer mad because I had the bedside lamp on and he couldn’t sleep. But I had to finish the book last night.

I knew what happened in Afghanistan under Taliban regime and before that under the Soviet invasion for the past 30/40 years. Reading about it all over again, now with two endearing protagonists in the picture, I was trying to put myself in their shoes. I can never imagine not going to work. Specially, if me not going to work meant my kids would have to go without food, what would have I done? What would I have done if I were told that there is no place for me in the hospital and I am about to give birth? What would I have done if I was told I couldn’t go out by myself? That I have to wear Burkha all the time? That I could be beaten for no apparent reason? That my daughter can not go to school? That I cannot watch TV/movie/play? That all books are “haaram” except the Quran? Scary, huh? And that’s only the tip of the iceberg. My heart went out once again to all the women out there. Not just in Afghanistan, but all over the world. Afghanistan, Sudan, Bangladesh, US – doesn’t matter where. There are women out there, living in fear, living under oppression, even at this time and age. I need to do something.

I remember seeing an episode of Oprah where she went to see some women being treated in a clinic in South Africa. A lady from US was so moved by the story that she decided to do something for the women. She didn’t have a lot of money, so she started making bracelets for the women with her daughter using simple, colorful beads. Next time when Oprah went back, she took the bracelets with her. You should have seen the smiles on everyone’s faces. No one probably ever stood up for them, let alone gave them anything nice. This small bracelet made them soooo happy. I kept thinking about it before falling asleep. I need to find out something I can do, even if it something as simple as making bead bracelets. My friend Katie is involved with an organization called "Nari Jibon". I need to give her a call.

I am proud to be a woman and thankful for the life I have.

A Birthday Story

by guest writer: Raffae

Long long time ago, there was a birthday. Happy birthday to Raffae. Raffae has balloons, and cakes and horns and candles. Someone has to hide and say Happy Birthday Raffae. Yup that's my story.

Murphy’s Law prevails

I have called for free tickets to U2, Madonna and some others tour tickets offered by the radio station I listen to on my way home. Usually I never get through. If I do get through, I am usually not the caller 10 (usually that’s the person who gets the ticket). On my way home yesterday, I called and was the caller 10 and got the free tickets – to go see American Idol tour.

Any huge American Idol fan out there that wants to take the tickets off my hand?

P.S. I don't like how my voice sounds!

I miss Bangladesh

My mom got a phone call from Bangladesh this weekend. It was from a lady who used to be our neighbor in Chittagong for as long as I can remember. Obviously after my mom came to US to live with me, she lost touch with a lot of people in Bangladesh. This lady was missing my mom so much that she set her son, Morshed, on a manhunt literally. Her son had cell phone numbers that my parents had used in Bangladesh at different times. He called each one and talked to the person answering the phone to figure out if that person knew where my mom is, could give him a number where he can reach my mom. He hit gold when one of those numbers was answered by my phupu. My mom gave my phupu her phone before leaving Bangladesh. So after pleasantries, Morshed got my mom’s cell phone number here and called over the weekend.

I was so touched by this incident. I kept thinking about chachi (as we used to call her) all throughout the weekend. I remember she used to send us Halwas, mistis, different types of pithas almost every week. My sister and I were regular visitors to her kitchen. Both her and her husband adored the two of us since they had three sons and no daughters. Whenever I had gone to Bangladesh in the past, I had always made a point of visiting her since she was always just couple of steps away. Now with Abbu gone and chacha retired, I hear they have relocated to Dhaka to live with their son. I kept thinking would I see them again?

Why do I not meet people like that over here? Is it me? Am I not open enough to people? Or is it really the people in Bangladesh? Are they born to be hospitable towards everyone? Are they more trustworthy towards people? Whatever it is, I am missing my childhood days like crazy.

Happy Birthday Raffae

My baby is turning four today! Many many happy returns of the day jaan! Love you. Mommy

Motherhood

Motherhood is funny. Without even realizing what you are getting into, you get into this unconditional relationship with someone for life! I was up to my neck at work when my mom called this morning. I answered the phone and before she could say anything, I heard Raffae crying in the background. I was instantly snapped out of my work mode into my mommy mode. I had a feeling this morning that he is going to have a rough day today. We enrolled him for swimming lessons at the community pool. He has been going to the pool every day for an hour or so and as a result comes back home dead tired. We dragged him to the mall with us last night after he came back from his swimming lesson and by the time we came back home, he was so tired he went to sleep right away. This morning, he woke up cranky and I suspect he is still tired. My mom said she has tried everything that normally cheers him up, but all he wants today is his mommy!!! My poor baby! I broke my decision of not giving him any of his birthday presents before his birthday and told my mom to give him one of the board games I got him. Hopefully that will keep him busy till mommy gets home with loads of hugs and kisses (not the candy, real hugs and kisses!). As for my work load, since my attention is pretty much shot for the day, I'll be playing Scrabble with my Facebook buddies for the rest of the day!

Observation of the day

Some people are sooooo stupid that I wish I had a mallet to hit them over the heads and make them better. Nuff said!

Beauty comes with a price!!!

Last night when I was taking out my contact lenses, one of them ripped! It looked quite intact on my hand, but once I went to bed, my eye kept watering and it felt like I had something in my eye. So I gave my eye a good rub. No change. More rubbing. No change. Then my head started throbbing. At one point, I got up, went to the bathroom, splashed some water in my eye and went back to bed. Couple of mintues of rubbing, burning later, I went back to the bathroom again and looked carefully. Holy crap! I see a small piece of my lense floating around in my eye!!!!!!!!!!!! EEEEKKKK. Panicked, I call Tanveer. Took him a while to even see the piece. He is all thumbs anyway, so he was no use! Everytime I tried to grab the floating piece, it escaped and I ofcourse touched my eye and that burned like hell! After five or so minutes, Tanveer was getting ready to take me to ER. I felt as if it came out. So I decided not to go to ER and sleep on it.

This morning, I woke up with a throbbing headache! It still felt like there is something in my eye. I followed the same routine of rinsing and rubbing. I called my brother-in-law who is an eye surgeon. He said I probably have an abrasion from all the rubbing. Definitely go see a doctor if it is still bothring me tomorrow morning.

Then sometime during the afternoon, I felt something slide across my eye. This time I looked into one of those mirrors that magnifies the reflection and I saw the culprit folded neatly right around my lower lid! I closed my eyes and it came out!!!!!!

I am glad my eye is still intact!

The worlds of ZeeNotes and Jiggety Jig finally collided

Finally we got to meet Katie Z and Isaac this weekend! Katie left a comment on Tanveer's blog sometime ago and when Tanveer checked out her blog, he found out we have a common friend! How small is this world! I've been reading Katie's blog ever since. She came to DC last week with her son Isaac (Coolest kid ever! Really funny. Kept us entertained and was very patient with Raffae) and was able to come visit us on Friday. Here are some pics of Raffae and Isaac. They jelled instantly, as if they were separated at birth!

See how they both know how to pose for the camera!

Isaac shared his Gameboy with Raffae

Raffae was worshipping Isaac for letting him play his Gameboy

Isaac very patiently showed Raffae how to play

The Death Clock

As if I wasn't depressed enough today, I found this on the web.

The Death Clock - When am I going to die?

My death date is Thursday, January 6, 2050 :'(

Reality bites

No matter how grown up I act/am, when it comes to my family, specially my “chacha”s, I still feel like a little girl. I grew up in a joint family, indulged by my uncles and aunts. They are an intricate part of my life, of who I am. I’ve been out of Bangladesh for a long time now and over time I feel like my ties have somewhat loosened with them. Then I see a picture or receive an email from one of them and I just want to throw all my responsibilities away and go sit on their laps just like I used to when I was a little girl and let them tell me that they will be there forever to take care of me, nothing bad will ever happen to me because they will be there to slay the monsters for me.

My Chacha has been sick for some time. I received some pictures from my cousin today. Chachchu looks soooo frail in the pictures. The pictures turned me into a complete emotional wreck today. Life sucks.

Home sweet home

After nine days of almost non-stop driving through torrential rain, sunny weather, scattered showers, cloudy days; throughout which we consumed way too many McDonald’s meals, Tim Horton’s/Starbucks coffee, donuts, chips, apples (Zoya ate three apples one day!), grapes, chanachur, cookies, Chinese food, awesome Indian food (One night in Montreal and one night in Toronto), and of course yummy homemade Biryani, shutki vorta along with other types of vorta; which took us to Centre Island, to African Lion Safari, to Montreal, to BioDome, to the Botanical Garden, to the Olympic Stadium, to visit family and friends; we are back home!

Highlights of the vacation:

• Raffae became a lion
  
• Zoya became known as the "Apple Baby"
  
• Raffae loves his cousins and cried for half an hour when we left Toronto.
  
• Tanveer is a lean mean driving machine!
  
• Raffae drove a car
  
• Zoya saw an "Ocean"
  
• I got THREE beautiful sarees as gifts!
  
• The weather in Montral sucked! Rained! We couldn't walk the city streets to our hearts content
  
• My mom found peace in Japanese garden
  
• My sister got "Kankles"
  
• My mil is in love with Montreal
  

Stay tuned for pictures!!!!! Hundreds of them! :-D

Words of wisdom from a three year old

Raffae broke one of his crayons this morning. When I tried to peel the paper away to get to the broken end, he screamed "Mommy, you can't peel it! It's not a BANANA!!!!" :-D

The Awful Truth

I went to the doctor last week. The assistant who came to check my pulse, blood pressure etc asked how tall I was and I said 5’2”. She looked at me and said lets measure you. I stepped under the measurement tape with a little smirk on my face. Then she said “Well, you are actually 5’ 1.5”. I guess you always round it up.”

Three things:
1) I swear on my kids I don’t remember rounding it up! My sister and I used to measure ourselves a lot growing up to see who is taller. We were always just about the same height and she always wanted to claim that she was taller. (She still is not btw). I know I am 5’ 2”
2) What does it matter even if I am .5” shorter? How does that affect my health?!
3) I guess I lied to Tanveer also. Baby, I am .5” shorter. Is that ok with you?

Friends

Anyone remembers my resolution earlier this year to get in touch with my friends? Well, I think I can safely check it off as DONE and it’s only May!!!!!!!!! :-) How it happened you ask? To begin with, I finally joined Facebook. (The average age of Facebook users also jumped up I hear the day I joined!! Hehehe…) An old high school friend found me from a group I became member of. Through him, I got in touch with two other friends! Saw their kids’ pictures, exchanged emails, even talked on the phone!

Couple of weeks ago, I got an email from a friend who saw my email address from another friend’s mass email and took the time to write to me. Glad to say, we are emailing each other regularly.

Then last week, I was in Dallas for work. I knew another friend from elementary days lives in Texas, but I wasn’t sure which city. Turned out she is in Dallas and I absolutely had to see her!!! Her kids are adorable. I’ll have to figure out how to post videos on here so I can show you the little dance number one of the kids performed for me!!! From my friend, I got the phone numbers for two other friends. I was able to talk to one of them and I am planning on calling the other one soon.

Remember that little rhyme that goes:

Make new friends
Keep the old
If these are silver
Those are gold

Whoever coined that rhyme knew from experience what he/she was talking about. Old friends are the best. I met some of these friends after like 15/19 years and it felt like we never lost touch.

There is one other friend in Bangladesh that I need to get it touch with. That’s my next project.

I love Technology!!!!!!

I was surfing the web for a handheld vacuum for my car and I found this. What will they think of next?? :-D

On Pins and Needles again

Zoya’s Pediatrician called this morning. She has some new information from the health department and wants to run some tests to see if Zoya has this disorder which would explain all her past medical history. On one hand, this new one seems to fit her. On the other hand, this means taking her to the doctor’s office/hospital again and she soooooooo hates it. I don’t want to put her through any more than she already has been, but a definite answer would put to rest so many unanswered questions/self doubts. It would also mean we can help her more. I need to be strong for this.

My handsome little guy!!

Bangladesh beat South Africa on Saturday in World Cup Cricket! I can just see the ear to ear grin on all Bangladeshis!!! Here is my little Bangladesh supporter.






I had to switch the tshirt around because he got upset that he couldn't see "Bangladesh"! :-D

Future Bollywood Star??

Amazingly I speak English even though I am brown skinned!!!!!!!!

As I was getting into my car this morning, a school bus came and stopped right behind me. The driver, an older white woman, slid open the window, said “Excuse me”. As I turned towards her, she looked at me, hesitated for 5 seconds (She really did, it was quite obvious) and then asked me “Do you speak English?”!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was leaving for work. I was dressed appropriately for work. I had my laptop bag on my shoulder. There was no way I could have been mistaken as a maid or a nanny or whatever else she thinks brown skin people do.

At the time I thought it was quite hilarious! She wanted to know where the Elementary school was. I gave her directions and we were both on our way. Then I started thinking about it and got more and more upset! I should have told her, “No, I don’t speak English” and driven away. I’ve had people tell me numerous times that my English is perfect or I speak English well! You know what?! I hate that too. Just because I am brown I am supposed to talk with an accent?! Arrrgggghhh!!

I know I am just ranting! Now let me go back to my work where I should get paid more since I have this amazing ability of speaking English even though I am brown.

He LOVES me!!!

Tanveer got me the Casino Royale DVD yesterday knowing how much I lust after Daniel Craig!! ;-) How can you not love a guy who is that confidant about his own MoJo??!! :-P Funny thing is Tanveer and Daniel share the same birthday! What can I say! I like my March 2nd boys..... ;-)

Creepy Helicopters

I woke up at 5:00 this morning and couldn’t sleep anymore. So I thought I’d get to work early and maybe put a dent on my to-do list. Well, traffic was worse than usual which is saying a lot as you might or might not know that DC area has the second worst traffic in US!! Heard on the radio that there was an accident ahead of me, which explained the traffic jam. As I neared the accident scene, I saw two news channel helicopters hovering over the accident area. That just creeps me out. Does it bother anyone else!? They make me think of vultures somehow! I see those helicopters a lot during my rush hour commute since all the news channels are now into "bringing you real-time traffic news". I just can’t get used to them somehow! I think because when I see them, I know there is something bad going on, and that translates to my dislike of them. Needless to say, despite my efforts, I still got to work late and now I am dragging since I woke up so early today! I just can’t win!

Raffae

Raffae wrote his name and Zoya's name without any help or guidance the other day!!!!!! Keep in mind he is only three and a half years old!!!! Couple of weeks ago, I noticed he is trying to spell anything and everything. We got him some books and things where he could trace the letters. As you can see he has been practicing diligently!! I am sooooooo proud of him! My baby is growing up so fast!

Rebirth of ZeeNotes??

I have been thinking about ending my blog stint for a while now. The problems are multi-fold:

• I have no time to update it regularly
  
• If I want to update it, I don’t have anything to write about!
  
• If I write up a post, it’s just BLAH!
  
• No one leaves a comment on my BLAH post, so I don’t really know if anyone is out there reading my blog.
  

Vain, I know! But I don’t want to write posts for myself only! That’s what diaries are for! I thought I’d post a “The End” on my blog and let it rest in peace. Two things happened today to change my mind:

• Simika left a comment on my last post asking why I am not updating anymore?
  
• I found a link to ZeeNotes on Friends and Daily Reads list on Tasnuva’s blog. Tasnuva, you are brilliant by the way!
  

Now I can’t let down TWO avid readers of ZeeNotes, can I?! :-P Guys, I'll be back with an amazing picture and a story to go with it very soon. Till then, hang on!

Love to you two for saving ZeeNotes!

About time!!!

Tintin in the news

Daniel Craig doubles?!

Just found this on the web. There are two other people that look like Daniel Craig??!!! Oh the joy!!!!!!!! :-D Who are these people?? Where do they live?

Facing my fears one at a time

I faced one of my fears yesterday – water; more specifically, swimming pool. I registered for a swimming class and yesterday was the first class. I was really scared thinking I wasn’t going to be able to take my feet off of the floor! But I did and I had fun! Man, swimming is hard! I was sooooooo tired by the time I came back home. I have to find some time to go back to the swimming pool and practice before next week’s class.

With swimming lessons in progress, next I guess I’ll have to get myself a bike! Yes I can’t bike either!!!!!!!! I was a bookworm growing up! I could probably name the capital of all the countries of the world. Almost all of them at least. So there….

Be careful what you wish for

Tanveer has always been a generous gift giver. Every birthday, anniversary, mother’s day, I get something really nice. Over the years, I’ve received jewelry, watches, purses etc. While I appreciate them very much, it became predictable over time! I have suggested to him in the past that maybe he could get me lots of little things that would show that he actually spent time thinking about what to get me. With our tenth anniversary approaching, he decided to do just that for me!

Off he went to Barnes and Noble and got me “The Memory Keeper’s Daughter”. He went to Bath and Body Shop and got me a body lotion, a hand lotion, a bubble bath foam, a body scrub, and a nice bright red tote bag. He then decided to go to Target to get a cover for my iPod which has been getting scratched since I toss it is my purse, my laptop bag etc. He got that and also picked up Grey’s Anatomy Season 1 DVD. He was on his way down on the escalators when he heard a noise behind him. He turned to find a shopping cart scrambling down towards him on the escalator. He said he realized he had about 4/5 seconds before the cart would hit him. Realizing he won’t be able to stop the cart with his hands, he braced himself for the impact. The cart hit him on his back, right in the middle! There were things flying out of the cart that started hitting him even before the cart hit him. This stupid lady was trying to bring her shopping cart down with her on the escalator and lost control!!!!!!!! Can you believe that?!!! My poor baby was in pain for three days!!!!!! Being the gentleman he is he didn’t say a single bad thing to the woman. (I probably would have scratched her eyes out if I were there!) Thank God that he didn’t fall down from the escalator or sustain severe injury! I told him for Mother’s Day, he can go back to the Coach store and get me another purse. ;-)

Catching up on my movies

Have you seen "Little Miss Sunshine"?? If not, I'd strongly recommend watching it! I loved that little girl. She is just sooooo adorable! I want her to win the Oscar.

Also watched "In Persuit of Happiness". I want Will Smith to win the Oscar also!! :-P

What does love mean to you??

To me love is postponing all plans for our tenth anniversary without a moments hesitation because Zoya has a fever.

Love is giving Raffae Oreo cookies for lunch cause he is sick also and is not eating at all.

Love is my mom making special dishes for our anniversary.

Love is all the calls/text messages/emails we received today.

Love is knowing a guy for eighteen years, being married to him for ten years and still falling head over heels in love with him every day. :-)

Ok, maybe not every day, but today for sure :-P

My life

My social life has seen quite a drastic change in the last couple of weeks. Couple of weeks ago, I went to have lunch with two of my friends. We went to a really cozy place called "Cafe Hon"!! The food was really really good. We then ended up in an open call for a movie audition! One of my friends knew the people in charge and we watched people auditioning for parts in the movie. It was hilarious to watch people say their lines. Almost like American Idol where people really believe that they can sing, but really don't have any talents.

Then last night, Tanveer and I went to watch a Violin Concert at the Library of Congress which was really awsome. We them met up with couple of friends and went to a lounge to hang out. I had the most decadent chocolate cake there!

Tonight my brother in law and his fiance are coming over and we might go out to watch a movie. My social life has not seen these many events in a month in a long, long, long time! Could I really be getting my life back??? We are trying to make some changes to our lives and this was one of the things we wanted back desparately: to be able to go out and have some time to ourselves without the kids, enjoy adult company without feeling guilty about it! Lets hope we can keep it up.

Zoya on American Idol

If there was no age limit, I’d have taken Zoya to audition for American Idol this year. You want to know what she would have sung??

Twa, twa
How I
Up up up
Da da da
Twa twa
How I

cap, cap, cap
Job!!!!!!!

Translation:

Twinkle, twinkle little star
How I wonder what you are
Up above the world so high
Like a diamond in the sky
Twinkle, twinkle little star
How I wonder what you are

Clap, clap, clap
Good job!!!!!!!!!!!

Simon would not have said “I couldn’t understand a word of that song!!” cause she looks absolutely adorable singing it! She does hand gestures too. :-D

Bored and brain dead at work

Katie literally read my mind when she wrote up this post. I don’t know what the reason is behind my blog anymore. I read back some of my old posts and it all reads like mindless ramblings, hence the new description on the blog! I haven’t seen much comments from readers recently either. What an attention craving blogger to do??!! Come on guys! I need some support, even if it is not 100% honest! Alright, how about if I make my blog sort of interactive? Ok here we go:

So here are the main themes of some of the things I am thinking about writing in the next couple of posts. Tanveer attacked by a shopping cart in Target. Zoya on American Idol. Making changes to our lives. Which one do you want to know about?? Leave a comment and I’ll oblige accordingly in my later posts.

Can't wait for July!!!!!!!!!!!

The fifth movie of the Harry Potter series is coming out on the 13th and the last book is coming out on the 21st!!!! Yipeeeeeeeeee!!! Speaking of Harry Potter, anyone seen the pictures of Daniel for his upcoming theatre role? The boy has grown up for sure!!!!! Anyway, going back to July, I think for Raffae's bday this year (which happens to be July 22nd), the theme HAS to be Harry Potter. Hopefully, I'll be done reading the book by then. Otherwise, I'll have to cancel it at the last moment!!!!! I'm sure guests wouldn't like their hostess to be reading during the party!

Stressed out

I’m so so restless. Things are up in the air - both at work and in our personal lives. We are trying to make some big changes to our personal lives. Can’t make a lot of decisions until work situations sort themselves out. And then there’s potty training! I am about to give up hope on Rafffae ever being potty trained! I think he has decided to go to elementary school in diapers! Nothing is working. We have tried anything and everything we can think of and people told us to do. As a last resort, I took away his diapers yesterday. I declared that he will only wear diaper when he goes to pre-school twice a week. I had a long conversation with him about what to do. Then, later in the evening …… well, lets just say I am thankful that I have hardwood floors and not carpet in my house. Any other suggestions from moms out there?

Goose Frava....

Sometimes I am really mean to people. This morning, someone called our home phone. When I answered the phone, the person on the other side of the line just hung up without a word. I figured he/she realized that it was not the correct number. Before I could turn away from the phone, it rang again. I saw from the caller ID that it was the same person calling back. Again I answered the phone and promptly I heard a click. That just pissed me off so much that I called the number back. A guy answered with an awkward “Hi”. I asked him if he had called my number. He said “Yes, but I think I got the number wrong.” I was so annoyed that I told him, not in a pleasant tone I assure you, that next time he calls a wrong number early in the morning; he should at least have the decency to apologize before hanging up. With that, I hung up the phone on him. Do I have anger management issues?? Or was my reaction justifiable?

Happy New Year

Wow! It’s been a month since I last posted on ZeeNotes. Things were crazy at work last month. The first phase of the project I am working on went live on Dec 13th, so everyone at work was literally camping out at the office. We had some long nights, lots of hard work, consumed gallons of coffee and soda, ate tons of Pizza and got this damn project up and running!!!!!! It was a great feeling. Fannie was the best thing that happened to me in 2006. Before Fannie Mae, I was stuck in a job that I hated and I was working with people that I didn’t quite like. I came to Fannie to do something different and ended up in a totally awesome project, working with a great bunch of intelligent people. I worked my butt off on this project and am very satisfied with the way my professional life is heading.

And then I got sick! Both Tanveer and I were sick like dogs for the last half of December. We ushered in 2007 amongst tissues, Nyquil, comforters and pillows!!! Some of us even went to sleep before the ball dropped!!! I am back to work now and knee deep into Phase 2 already!

So how is 2007 going for you so far? Are you still keeping your resolutions?? I broke my rule and made couple of resolutions this year! I know I’ll break half of them before January ends, but at least if I don’t try, it’s not going to happen at all! One of my resolutions is to get in touch with friends and family this year. I’ve written about this before also. I have lost touch with friends in the last couple of years and it is mostly my fault. I am just too busy with kids, commute and work. But I am determined to get back on track this year. I was always known for remembering everyone’s and their neighbor’s birthdays and I don’t think I even called all my close friends last year to wish them a happy birthday!!!!!!!!!! I am surprised that they still reply to my emails every once in a while! ;-) So there! It’s out in the open. If I miss your birthday again this year, I’ll completely understand if you don’t send me an email ever.

Which ones do you remember?

I am sure you all have seen this already. I don’t think I’ll ever forget this story. It got me thinking. What are the news events that I remember very vividly from my past? Here are some of them:

• The Uruguayan rugby team plane crash in Andes – I read about this when I was about 7/8 years old. There were lots of old Reader’s Digests in my grandfather’s house and I somehow stumbled upon an issue that had this story. I remember the pictures from that issue still quite vividly. I wish I had saved that magazine. Needless to say, I watch “Alive” every time it is on TV.

• The Challenger crash – Anyone my age should probably remember this. I always tell people that I’d love to go to the orbit and see the earth from above. I think the Challenger incident is the inspiration behind this. I was excited about the mission cause it involved the first ever civilian going to space. Before, I guess I knew I would never be an astronaut, but with a civilian in the crew, I think all of a sudden I realized that there still might be a way for me to go to space!!!! Now if I only had about $20 million handy and I was couple of inches taller, my dream wouldn’t have been that far from reality!

• Charles and Diana Wedding – Which little girl wouldn’t like the fairytale wedding they had?! I remember I went to the mall with my mom and a lot of the stores were closing early so they could go home and watch the wedding. We hurried back home too.

• Idi Amin – I was scared of Idi Amin! I must have heard someone talk about him. I don’t think I even knew who he was. I just knew that he was into “cannibalism” and that was enough to make me scared of him at that early age.

• 9/11 – enough said.

Proud Mommy

Raffae was watching Shrek 2 over the weekend. He used to watch it a lot when he was lot younger. I guess he forgot the story or was just too young to follow the storyline earlier. At the end, when Shrek takes the potion and turns into a human, he kept saying “Mommy, where is Shrek?”, “Oh no! Shrek is gone”, “Mommy, we need to find Shrek”. I was doing other stuff and wasn’t really looking at him when I was trying to explain to him that Shrek just looks different, but he is still very much there. The last thing he said to me was “Mommy, we have to fix it!!!!!” and then … I heard a sob!!! I looked at him and he had tears in his eyes. I asked him ofcourse why he was crying and that just opened the floodgate!!!!!!!!!! He was soooooo very upset. He was crying uncontrollably! My mom came downstairs thinking he got hurt. Both my mom and my mother-in-law always say that Raffae is very kind hearted (“Or mon ta khub norom”). I know he gets attached to people very quickly. But this was still so unexpected. I was proud of him that he cares so much for others. At the same time I was worried thinking life would be cruel to him. He will get hurt a lot by being so sensitive.